Posts Tagged ‘kindness’

Today’s Lesson: People don’t change.

January 15, 2010

I am rather optimistic. I like to believe in the best of people. Sometimes I’m proven wrong.

I had tried to befriend a person and they just played games with me. I don’t know why. I was always forthright with my intentions but they made a mockery of me. I thought they were a person who got it. Who stood for peace and equality not cruelty. They turned out to be one of the biggest jerks I knew by doing things to laugh at me – not with me.

Bounce ahead, four or so years. I still wanted to believe the best of this person. I thought their duplicity was a result of peer pressure so maybe outside of that setting they’ll be a decent person. I don’t like to make a villain out of anyone and I try to see the best. I don’t like having negativity associated with people so I wanted to see if they had change in the past four years. My findings were conclusive that they haven’t. It’s the same old song and dance.

When I told my doctor that I thought this person would change, she laughed at me. I know I’m a completely different person than I was four years ago because I am always working on improving myself. I want to be the best I can be. Apparently, most humans don’t operate that way. They don’t change unless they have a reason to change – and even then sometimes they don’t. Most cases they get worse. I don’t get it.

I am always reading and educating myself. I try to talk to as many people as I can about anything and everything. I have a genuine desire to help the world. I have learned you can’t help the world until you help yourself first. It was a hard lesson for me because I always want to put everyone and everything else first but sometimes you got to make sure you are okay before you can make sure other people are okay. Even on airplanes, they tell you to put your air mask on first before helping others. There’s a method to this madness.

I am disappointed that there are jerks in the world. I always thought life was about living – I mean really living and not letting hatred or pettiness cloud your vision. I would like to think of the world as a big human community – like how we come together for things like Haiti. Why do we only come together in times of disaster? I think the world would be amazing if we kept the community spirit all the time.

This person is beyond my comprehension. I used to try to understand other’s perspective and points of view until I met them. I realize I can have no idea what goes on in another person’s head. It really isn’t my concern either. One of the hardest things I have is finding people who want friendship and connection. Just finding anyone who’s willing to accept love and kindness is really hard. Obviously, this person doesn’t. Not from me anyways.

It’s a hard thing for me to accept that I can’t befriend the entire world. I wish I could. It upsets me that there are people who hate me without even knowing me. That there is even hate at all. But that’s reality.

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On Greed and Selfishness

December 24, 2009

I was talking to my doctor the other day and the issue of human greed came up.  Are humans inherently greedy?  I personally believe the answer to the question is “No.”  My doctor tried to used the example of how the world is today but what my doctor was forgetting is that the sample population being looked at was only 1% of all humans who ever lived on this planet.  It is my argument that it’s the way it currently is in the world is because of how we teach people to be.  That greed and selfishness isn’t human nature as society likes to preach.

The problem in society is based in the foundation.  That foundation is capitalism.  Capitalism teaches us to be greedy and selfish.  The winners in capitalism are those who exploit, legally rob, and cheat the most people.  Success isn’t measured by how many smiles you bring into the world but by how much money one makes.

Things have only been “this way” for the last 10,000 years.  Before that, humans and the planet were getting along just fine.  The problem started when man decided that the earth belong to him instead of the fact that man belongs to the earth.  I am not saying civilization is inherently bad – the Greeks and the Romans did just fine without causing the destruction on the planet we are now.  Man needs to learn to have the damage done to the planet and the planet’s ability to replenish itself  in sync.

I argue if we were to have a system based on community, sharing, and brotherhood – we would have a different world.  If parents didn’t raise their children to put “me” first.  If we taught that treating others with respect, compassion, and kindness instead of being taught that everything is a commodity.

Even the way we relate to people in retail and service reflects how capitalism has brainwashed society.  We do not see the salespeople as humans who have a family at home and their own problems.  If we did, people wouldn’t get half as mean, nasty, or upset.  We’re so conditioned that we don’t even see having the right to chose what to eat, where to shop, and what to wear as having a privilege.  Most retail stores remove all human aspects from their presentation – with each store, no matter where you are in the world – having the exact same service and the exact same product.  Cookie cutter products for cookie cutter people who like to believe they are “unique.”  It’s all a lie.

A few stores, like Costco have policies that none of their products can come from sweatshop labor.  But, we as consumers are so far removed from the way things are produced that we allow inhumane treatment for our mass produce goods.  Most of the time, people’s clothes are more well traveled than the wearer.  Most people don’t even think about the person who made it – how they have families, problems, and poverty.  We need to focus on having a human community were everyone gets their share.  Global wealth created global poverty.

I think this is one of the harder concepts I have to get people to wrap their heads around.  For every action, there is a reaction.  The reaction of having rich is that we have the poor.  In other countries, there is a limit to how much a CEO can earn.  It makes the gap between the rich and poor less so people are more level.  Not that there isn’t rich and poor, but really, how many yachts do you need?  And how many children die of hunger a day?  Think about it.

One of the main problems is that we are conditioned to not think about it and accept the motto, “This is the way things have always been.”  This is false.  We can change the world and make it a beautiful place for everyone if we just cared a little and put some thought into what we consume.